i have discovered something amazing

i like cheesecake.

i didnt think i would.

it seems too.... non-floury.

but hubby loves it.

and there was a recipe on better homes and gardens that was in the magazine and easy to follow.

white chocolate cheesecake, with dark chocolate sauce.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. chocolate.

and some very dear friends came over on tuesday night. (i will have known them for 25 years in jan/feb. i turned 25 in august. they are as close as family.)

and i wanted dinner to be really nice.

so i made the cheesecake.

and managed not to ruin it.

and i tried it.

even though it contains EIGHT EGGS.

and it was yummy.

oh was it ever yummy.

and i am now a convert.

and my friends loved it.

and hubby loved it.

and mum loved it.

and i want to make another one for hubby.

with raspberry sauce.

because he said it would be good.

and i love him so much it hurts.

i had such a wonderful day yesterday

a few weeks ago i got in contact with an old friend from school. she dropped out before we finished, because she didnt like school and the school didnt like her, and i basically havent heard form her since. that was in 2000. then i suddenly found her on facebook just a few weeks ago.

she has an 18month old daughter, shes engaged, and she and her fiance have bought an apartment, and she has grown up so much since high school. i guess i must have to, but we rarely see these things in ourselves, do we.

my son and her daughter get on so well. he really looks out for her, helping her up when she falls down, pushing her on the rocking-horse-thing at the park, holding her hand when we're at the shops, showing her how to do things. its great. he really has a chance to shine as the Big Boy instead of playing baby like he tends to do with me. and she just laps it up. she follows him everywhere and wants to do whatever he does - being that shes still really just a bay there have been a few possessiveness issues, but my friend is quite happy for me to take my sons things away from her and tell her No, so its all been great.

every wednesday they come over and we cook or go to the park or something. she's been missing intelligent-adult-parent company, as all the other young mums she knows are, to put it mildly, very young. they may only be a couple years younger than we are, but by golly they are babies. im slightly alarmed that someone could possibly not know what 'migrating' means. or think that "its amazing how you meet people and stuff."


on to the point.

as well as finding K on facebook, another old friend who left in about '98 to go back to the USA recently appeared on facebook. so K and i coerced her into coming around yesterday - not too hard a task since she's clucky as anything. we made pizza and garlic bread, M brought a salad - and gifts for the kids, a stuffed gorilla for little S and some toy cars for my critter - and K brought chocolate, then we made some peanut-butter-choc-chip cookies as well, so we were all well and truly stuffed. have i mentioned i like to feed people? M had a great time playing with the kids, K and i were ecstatic to see her again, and the kids just lapped up all the attention.

unfortunately, we only found M a few weeks ago, and shes going back to the USA - probably for good - in a couple months. i am going to miss her so much.


but through Teh Power Of Teh Interwebs And Facebook we will at least be able to keep in touch this time.


i love my friends.

no more john howard

i'm glad labour won the election. im not sure how good a prime minister rudd will be, but howard was in for too long, and costello.. well. lets not go there.

australia is in for a change, thats for certain.

does anyone have nay head-screws?

im not too keen on looking like frankenstein, but my head jsut doesnt seem to be screwed on right at the moment.

either that or all the changing weather has shaken my brain loose.

im having a lot of trouble thinking.

i think im going to go stare vacantly at some childrens television for a while.

i have lurkers.

i know because i am sneaky.

aparantly on friday i had 42 page loads between 4 people.

sam? are you really that obsessed?

or is someone else being lurky?

hello. my name is sarah.

blogger informs me i have 99 posts. that would make this number 100. ever wanted to know far too much about me?

i didnt think so.

but my son is bashing and crashing not so quietly in the other room, and i dont want to disturb his peace.

feel free to run away at any time.

since i dont know what to write and will ramble.

a lot.

in a nonsensical manner.

1. my name is sarah. (as if you didnt get that from the title.)
2. the year i was born it was THE MOST POPULAR girls name. because of royal people getting married. oddly, my parents have the most likely parents names or that year too.
3. i was not named because of the royal.
4. i was named after my mothers paternal grandmother.
5. as a child (and still, really, i suppose) i wasnt too fond of my name.
6. when playing pretend, i always chose the name emma.
7. i recently found out my great grandmother was called sarah emma.
8. obviously, my mother gave me the wrong name.
9. i took my first plane trip at about 4 months of age.
10. my most recent was at 23-and-a-half, with an 18 month old - his first plane trip.
11. my son was born a month after my 22nd birthday.
12. i was in labour for 4 hours.
13. with only 2 panadiene and a couple heatpacks for pain relief.
14. next time i want LOTS OF DRUGS.
15. if there is a next time.
16. i lost over a litre of blood having my son.
17. wasnt that fun.
18. i have a younger sister.
19. my parents were technically not married when i was born - they got divorced a few years prior, and never remarried.
20. this means i have american citizenship.
21. i can probably also get brittish, since my dad is a pom.
22. so is my husband. he was born in the US military wing of a hospital in oxford, england. so he has 2 birth certificates.
23. my son, therefor, can also have 3 citizenships.
24. arent we all fancy?
25. i like cheese.
26. and chocolate.
27. and bacon
28. but not for breakfast. it was one of my anti-cravings when i was pregnant, and my taste has never recovered.
29. milk too. which is a pity, cause i LOVE MILK. but now it makes me sick
30. i hardly got any cravings during my pregnancy, just anti-cravings.
31. except mcdonalds chicken nuggets. i know, disgusting.
32. for a while, all i could eat was green koolaid, and honey-nut cheerios.
33. EVERYTHING else made me sick.
34. wasnt that fun.
35. my son loves broccoli.
36. obviously, he isnt mine.
37. actually, if i didnt know better, id say they swapped him at the hospital.
38. he is the only person in my, or my husbands family, with EXTRA-SUPER-REALLY-DARK-BROWN-ALMOST-BLACK eyes.
39. mine are greenish, so are hubbys, my mums are blue, dads are light-brown-and-blue, sisters are blue, his dads (and all his dad's side family) are greenish, his mums are blue.
40. i have extra-super-pale skin that burns very easily and doesnt tan.
41. kid picked up his dad's easily-tannable skin, and is already darker than me, at three years old, despite spending the same amount of time outside.
42. did i mention my husband is almost half italian?
43. and im a million different variations on EXTRA SUPER PALE WHITE FOLK?
44. including english irish scottish french and polish.
45. im so glad the kid got his daddy's tanning gene.
46. unfortunately he also got both our hairy genes.
47. my son already has a monobrow.
48. and hair on his legs.
49. and if daddy is anything to go by, i have less than a decade till he hits puberty.
50. i am NOT doing The Talk.
51. no.
52. NO.
53. i have already told hubby this.
54. he laughed at me.
55. did i mention i love him?
56. i get up at 6:15 in the morning to make him lunch.
57. then i go back to bed till i can function.
58. or i get woken up by a three year old.
59. i am not a morning person.
60. and im not really a night person.
61. because i need SO. MUCH. SLEEP.
62. seriously.
63. i cannot function on less than 9 hours.
64. 12 is better.
65. breastfeeding, therefor, was a living nightmare.
66. even ignoring the fact that he didnt want to feed from me.
67. but would happily take a bottle of breastmilk from his daddy.
68. and then cry if daddy tried to pass baby and bottle to mummy.
69. didnt that make a new mother with PND feel just fantastic?
70. i have been medication free for 18 months.
71. and i feel fantastic.
72. usually.
73. christmas will be difficult.
74. because my other baby will not be here with us.
75. but i keep telling myself the baby is in a better place now with God.
76. and i will try and ignore my hairdresser's enormous belly when i see her in a couple weeks.
77. because it will just make me think of my baby again.
78. when really, i should be enjoying the soft shiny nicely coloured hair that she gives me.
79. instead of the soft shiny oddly coloured hair God gave me.
80. really.
81. cant tell if its brown or blond.
82. or very occasionally almost red.
83. despite being WHITE BLOND when i was a critter.
84. unlike my kids, which is now almost the same colour as mine is without hairdresser-help.
85. so i think hes going to be dark like his daddy.
86. i like his daddys super-curly black hair.
87. its pretty.
88. i like his daddy.
89. he makes me happy.
90. because he BBQs really good.
91. gee dont i just have great grammar.
92. despite my mother being an english teacher.
93. and my father being a lawyer.
94. i went to university for 6 months before deciding i hated it and stopping going.
95. then i worked for my dad for a year.
96. i am never working for my father again.
97. i would much rather keep my house.
98. and raise my son.
99. and be with my husband.
100. and love God.

i think i got sunburnt. again.

we helped my sister move yesterday. this involved hiring a truck and making TWO TRIPS from her place to dad's wife's place - over 40min each way - to store her things under the house up there till she moves into her own place in about 3 months, since she's subletting a room from a friend right now and its furnished...

and then hubby and critter and i stayed up there and had some lunch and went in the pool - they went in the pool, i sat on then edge with my feet in - and got sunburnt. well, not critter, cause he had sunscreen and a rashie and stuff, but i just didnt even think to put any on me. i guess because i was so tired.

i'll learn one day.

the difference between baking and cooking

because one of my mates who REFUSES TO COMMENT HERE and emails me instead, asked.

for me, baking involves precise measurements. you MUST use 2 cups of flour, or it wont work. you MUST use no more than 1/2 cup milk or it will glug. you MUST use lukewarm water, or the yeast will do nothing.

cooking is more of a make-it-up-as-you-go-along thing. having stir-fry? throw in whatever you feel like. roast dinner? check it every now and then until its cooked.

everytime i COOK, i do something a little different. and sometimes, this means the exact same dish turns out differently than it did last time. when i BAKE i follow the recipe precisely, because im just not that good yet.

also, i cook by instinct.. i guess. i really couldnt tell you why some days i use more ginger in my stirfry and some days i use more cinnamon. or why sometimes the roast has more oil than others. or why sometimes i use twice as much butter in my mashed potatoes, and sometimes i use a lot more milk. i just throw stuff at my food until it feels right.

and thats the difference between cooking and baking.

medical in australia

links to be insterted later when im actually awake




i posted about getting back A LOVELY LARGE AMOUNT of taxes a few days back, and someone commented:

".... We do get a tax refund for my daughter, but it's not even close to what we paid in medical bills to have her! ...."



well. heres the real beauty of it. basically, anything other than elective surgery is covered by the government health care over here, so having the baby was free. having three ultrasounds was free. being in hospital every week because my bloodpressure couldnt decide if it wanted to be high or low was free.

you do pay for doctors visits. sometimes. depends on if they bulk bill - you sign a paper, they charge the government straight up.

if they DONT bulk bill, you pay the fee, usually about $35 for a normal doctors visit, they give you a receipt, you take it to medicare, and medicare gives you back $27. or something. my doctor bulk bills, so i havent had to do it for a while.

same with any specialist. the government gives you back something like 70% of the 'proscribed fee' if the doctor doesnt bulk bill.

so lets assume its 70% because i dont know how much it actually is, and its too early in the morning to go look it up.

and lets pick easy numbers because its too early in the morning.

now obviously, doctors can charge whatever they want. but its usually not TOO MUCH more than proscribed fee.

so assuming the p.f is $100, you go to the pediatrician, he charges $120, you take your receipt to medicare and get $70 back - in cash if you want - and youre still only out of pocket $50.


my sister went to THE NORMAL DOCTOR in the states, and was charged something like $300. which was aparantly cheap.

I CANNOT COMPREHEND THIS. i have never paid more than $9 out of pocket for a normal doctor IN MY LIFE. i think even for the pediatrician for my son - who weve been to about 10 times in 3 years - im never out more than $70.

when i was in hospital after my son was born - they kept me in for 4 days because i lost a fair amount of blood - my husband and my mother went home together. he had only been in the country for 3 months. and he commented to my mother than the hospital hadnt told him how much it was going to cost him yet. my mother had to explain that it was free. i dont think he had understood when i told him about medicare.

if you choose to go to hospital for an emergency (4 month old has excema so bad he's on his second dose of anti-biotics and his feet are covered in pimples? GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM.) or have a baby or whatever WITHOUT PRIVATE HEALTH INSURANCE you will not pay a single cent. even if your in for a week and see a dermatologist, a pediatrician, and an allergy specialist EVERY DAY. and when you have to take your kid back to the hospital every month for a check up with THE HEAD OF PEDIATRIC DERMATOLOGY, you will not pay a single cent.

also - prescriptions. some things, like anti-depressants, antibiotics, heart medication, stuff like that, is on the 'pharmaceutical benefits scheme'. so you get it cheap. and if you have a pensioners/low income earners card, you pay even less. i dont think ive ever paid more than $40 for a prescription.



just another reason im glad we moved back here.

food may be expensive (groceries were only $230 this week. for 3 people and a pre-schooler. and i was happy. becasue it was so low), houses may be expensive (there is a REASON we live with my mother, other than just keeping her from being lonely), but id rather be paying off a mortgage than a birth.

must.... finish.... skirt....

i have to get my skirt finished. i need it. everything else is dirty.

but im afraid.

i am not a good sewer. this is my second attempt at anything other than a couple straight lines. the first attempt didnt turn out so well. the sewing was sound, the pattern wasnt.

and.. what f i mess something up big time? what if i do something nuts with the button holes? what if i cut the hem too short? what if what if what if what if what if what if what if.....


my mother never really taught me to sew. i have vague recollections of helping her make me a skirt when i was 11 or something.. but im basically now teaching myself, at 25, on a VERY FANCY AND EXPENSIVE sewing machine thats really more than half computer (what sort of stitch would you like today? how fast? okydoky! push a button and away we go!! want to embroider something? insert memory cart, push button and WALK AWAY FROM THE MACHINE TIL IT BEEPS to let you know its finished!!), and i am so worried im going to ruin either my skirt, or the machine, or me. i am STILL afraid im going to sew my fingers together. even thought i cant actually get them under the needle. shush. stop laughing at me.

i DID manage to break one of the needles on the overlocker - serger - when i was finishing the seams. didnt that make me feel JUST FINE AND DANDY THANKYOU OH SO MUCH.


sigh.


i managed iron on interfacing, i made up the pattern and adjusted seams as i went, i actually managed a CURVED waistband, ive figured out a way to do the buttons because i WILL NOT attempt a zipper on my first try... why is the hem scaring me so much?

because if i can finish this skirt, i can build up the courage to try something else.

God take away my scared please.

i. am. so. tired.

and i dont know why. i dont think ive been sleeping well.

waking up at 6:30 this morning to do hubby's lunch instead of the 7-7:30 ive been used to didnt help any either... but i just dont feel as rested as i should. ive been getting plenty of sleep, it must just not be very good quality sleep. grr.

i havent felt like this since critter was a newborn and waking up every hour or so. wasnt THAT fun.

where have all the good men gone?

in an attempt to avoid nonsense tv, we've been watching the ABC at 6:30 between the 2 news programs, instead of whatever is on other channels. on mondays, its talking heads, and today was jimmy barnes.

he told the story of his childhood, and something struck me as very very interesting.


imagine this.

you have 6 children, and have moved to a new country. your husband is a violent drunk, so you leave him, and because you feel you have no other choice, you leave your children too.

their father finds it hard to cope, and the children are close to becoming wards of the state. if you were married, you would probably be given your children.

one day, you comment on this to some of your friends, mostly women, but one is a male friend. and he promptly says "i'll marry you".

i simply cannot imagine this happening in todays society. and that makes me sad.

im sad.

i feel oddly sad today. and i dont know why. im sure i'll feel better tomorrow. or maybe even later today. but for the moment, there is 'sad' hanging all over me and i feel droopy. good thing my kid is cuddly. cuddles always help. now if only i could convince him he doesnt have to strangle me to cuddle me....

BUT ITS NOVEMBER!!!

whos in charge of the weather? i want to talk to you RIGHT NOW.

i have some complaints.

well... ONE complaint.



it is november.
it is australia.
in australia, november=nearly summer.
SO WHY IS IT SO COLD IVE BEEN PUTTING HEATERS ON. let alone IT IS SNOWING. um, not where i am. it does not snow here. but it has been snowing in australia. grr.

i am thankful for the rain. our dams need it desperately. australia is dry enough as is, and now in a drought...

but the cold? IT IS NOT JUNE. it is NOVEMBER. i should be trying to figure out how to stay cool without sitting in a bathtub full of cold water. not wondering how many layers i can wear while still being able to it comfortably behind my (actually my mums) sewing machine and finish a skirt which is now SO NOT WARM ENOUGH FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE.

my child is weirder than yours

tonight as i was cutting up mushrooms for dinner, critter came up to me, and we had the following conversation.

i want a jeyee beenee. i want *frowny face as he tries very hard to hold up 2 fingers* two jeyee beenee. a byak one, and a byak one.

really? how nice for you.

*shock, then understanding* pyees?

there! see thats the word mummy needs to get you something! but i'm going to give you a red one and a black one, ok?

no! a byak one and a byak one!!

red or nothing *hands him the jelly beans*

*sulky face, but he ate them anyway*


how many children (or people in general, for that matter) WANT the black jelly beans, and nothing but the black jelly beans?

he loves broccoli too.



my kid is weirder than yours.

wow

so i came online to transfer some money from our normal bank account to our high-interest-online-savings-account, and pay hubby's phone bill.

phone bill paid, although im still not sure why its $8 higher than it should be. oh well, whatever.

then on to the bank.

hmm.

theres far too much money there.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!! TAXES!!!!!!

since i dont work, and hubby's income is below the upper threshold for the family tax benefit, i get A LOT of taxes back, despite having paid NONE. so while hubby owes the government some money this year, its ok, because they just gave me about 7 times what he owes.

im still not sure WHY the government pays me back taxes that i havent paid to begin with.... but im not going to complain about it. just tell myself i get paid once a year to raise my son.

and in a case of BLECH

i just hit my leg, cause it was tickly and i was hoping the *smack* noise and wooshing hand would shoo away the fly that was sitting there.

it didnt.

because.

because...

because...

i hit the fly.

and it dropped to the floor.

all mushed.


blech.

please excuse me while i go wash my hands for an hour or so.