sister dearest

my sister said something interesting yesterday.
"enough with the skirts already!" whats wrong with wearing skirts? "you look like a jew"

im not sure what to think.
- should i be offended that she doesnt think i look ok in a skirt?
- should i be amused that she is THAT worried about what other people think of ME, not of her?
- should i be worried that she apparently hates jews so much that she doesnt want her sister to look like one?
- should i just accept that my sister is often a nitwit, and continue to do whatever i want, as my husband keeps telling me?

the rest of the conversation:
im more comfortable in a skirt. and i dont have to worry about my backside (i may in fact have said arse, since i was anxious to get home and cook dinner, and i was in a bad mood after watching her and my father fight for a couple of hours) hanging out every time i sit down. (or muffin-tops, although that didnt cross my mind at the time) "yeah. well. thats what you think" (in a silly voice, granted. she wasnt actually disagreeing with me on that)

sometimes i dont understand my sister. i am comfortable in a skirt. im not flashing my rear end at the world every time i sit down. (i have come to the conclusion that jeans are made for standing around looking good in, not for sitting down in everyday life. the best belt in the world wont hide my underwear from an unwary passerby if i sit down. and no-one makes tops long enough for tall people like me. there must be some somewhere, but i cant find them. grrrrrrrrrrrr.) if someone sees me wearing a skirt and immediately thinks JEW! or MUSLIM! or YOU MEAN THERES ACTUALLY SOMEONE WHO DOESNT WEAR JEANS???? isnt that their problem for being ignorant? despite which, i dont wear a headscarf, and im obviously not wearing a wig (my hair would be much much neater) so why would they? anyone outside st ives or the eastern suburbs probably wouldnt know enough to think JEW! and anyone IN those areas would recognise the lack of wig, and the lack of anything other than hair on my sons head, and think i must just like skirts.

i also dont always understand my sisters view in relation to religion. she considers herself a christian. she often makes much of the fact that my husband is NOT, because he is catholic (oh the horror!!!!) and doesnt attend church. (he feels uncomfortable in any church that isnt catholic, and despises catholic churches. kinda hard to win there.)

lets take a look at the two of them shall we?
my husband has a firm belief in God, in Christ. he prays. he provides for his family, he protects his wife and son. he does not attend church.
my sister has a firm belief in God, in Christ. she prays. she attends church, sometimes. she attends bible study.
other than attending church, what is the difference? nothing. absolutely nothing.

i have problems with my sister. many many problems. her hypocrisy annoys me greatly. you cannot claim it is wrong to so much as kiss a boy before you are married to him, and then go make out with some random guy you are never going to see again, because he lives in europe somewhere (sweden i think she said) and you live in australia, and it is your last night in san fransisco, and you are both drunk. you cannot refuse to lead part of the church service because "women shall not teach, or have authority over men", then constantly lecture your father and brother-in-law. its hypocritical.

she claims she was not a christian back when she was getting drunk a lot, even though she claimed she was back then. i dont agree with this. i dont believe she wasnt a christian just because she did bad things. her belief in God hasnt changed any, just her attitudes towards how she lives her life. she might not have been a very GOOD christian, but actions do not negate belief. belief should temper your actions, but it doesnt always happen.

i consider myself a christian. i always have. i was raised as a christian, i attended church, i believe in God. i believe Jesus is God/God's son (my brain hurts too much if i try to unravel all that in a satisfactory manner, so i just leave it), that He loves me, died for me, and forgives me. much to my fathers horror. (hasidic jew. wishes we were too.) just because i lived with my husband before we were married, and we were in fact Naughty (6 months pregnant at wedding. uh-huh.), does not mean i was not a christian. i just wasnt doing things right. i have prayed, confessed my sins, and asked for forgiveness. and i am confident that it has been given. isnt that the basis of our faith?

we are not an acts based faith. my father does good deeds, as many as he can, in order to get on God's good side, and get into heaven. (he also believes that getting married wipes away all your sins and leaves you with a clean slate. lets not even go there.) christianity is not like that, and many people have problems with christianity because of that. "joe bloggs is a murderer. he killed 17 people, and will be executed next week. but he has found God, become a christian, and is truly repentant for his sins. he is going to heaven." "alice smith is a lovely woman. she looks after sick wildlife, gives money to the poor, and helps out once a week at a retirement village. she is not a christian. she is not going to heaven."

people have a problem with that.

joe is BAD, he killed people. he should go to hell. but God has forgiven him. Christ died for joe, just as much as He died for me, and you, and everyone else.
alice is GOOD, she helps people. she is A Nice Person. she should go to heaven.

God does not work that way. the only way to heaven is through Christ (NKJ, NIV). this is a very hard concept to accept, and to our sinful human nature, it does not seem fair. but think about this. God sent his son to die for us. is it really fair for someone to go to heaven who rejects this beautiful gift He has given us?

im rambling again. that happens a lot. ive never been good at coherence.

anyway, what is my point? it doesnt matter that my sister got drunk, that i didnt wait til marriage, that my husband doesnt attend church. all the good deeds in the world will not get you into heaven, do not make you a christian. doing bad things doesnt make you Not A Christian, although being a christian should make you want to do good things, in order to glorify God.

everyone sins every day. but we are so lucky to have such an awesome God that we can be confident in our forgiveness, because He loves us so much.